i realized something tonight. the passions i have- for music, for writing, for people, all come from the Lord.
the blessings in my life and the things that bring me joy, even all the little things, bring me joy because i know where they come from.
it's like every good thing i encounter is increased tenfold with the knowledge that, as Scripture says, "every good thing is from above."
that's a nice little bit of contentment.
tonight i did my nails. it was actually my new years' resolution this year- to paint my nails more often. kind of a vague resolution, but i think i'm doing pretty well at fulfilling it.
tomorrow there are a lot of things to get done, including calling for more information about that stem cell study. sounds intense. i should sleep now!
:buenas noches:
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Saturday, September 22, 2007
ups and downs
a few setbacks lately. trying to figure out if the humira is really kicking in or if it's really been the prednisone working its "magic" this whole time. so far it looks like the latter, mainly because as i've been tapering down on the pred, i've not been feeling quite as good. sigh.
now there's talk of getting involved in a research study at duke. either that or going back to remicade, which is an IV drug that has been really great for me in past years. after those, the only other option is surgery. yea, that's not going to happen!
i could definitely use your prayers right now!
i could also do better about taking these things (well, everything)to prayer myself. i've been trying to do that more lately, and i'm relearning what an impact that can have on spiritual health.
also relearning: feeding the right areas of my life is important. and starving the areas that i know need correction is important too.
buenas noches.
now there's talk of getting involved in a research study at duke. either that or going back to remicade, which is an IV drug that has been really great for me in past years. after those, the only other option is surgery. yea, that's not going to happen!
i could definitely use your prayers right now!
i could also do better about taking these things (well, everything)to prayer myself. i've been trying to do that more lately, and i'm relearning what an impact that can have on spiritual health.
also relearning: feeding the right areas of my life is important. and starving the areas that i know need correction is important too.
buenas noches.
Saturday, September 15, 2007
fall-ish
today was jes' first football game of the season. and with a cool breeze and an avg. temp. of 70 degrees for the day, it really felt like fall.
so today has been really nice- especially compared to yesterday. it was a long day at duke. what should have been a quick CT scan turned into almost four hours in the office. most of that time was various nurses doing their best to start an IV in my small veins. six attempts. and they ended up giving up, doing the CT without IV contrast... oh well. :)
i gave myself another dose of my miracle drug, humira, last night. it's actually something i look forward to, especially since i'm able to give it to myself without much timidity. ;) now i have a glimpse of what diabetics deal with EVERY day, not just every other week...
my other miracle drug, prednisone, is definitely proving to be a blessing and a curse. i started out taking 40mg after being in the hospital and have been slowly tapering since then. 40 mg gave me serious insomnia, mood swings(good AND bad ones) increased appetite, and a lovely moon face among other side effects. what's a moon face, you ask? well, think chipmunk cheeks.
needless to say, that last one makes me completely insecure. as in- i'd rather noone see me until it goes away. maybe next month i'll be social again!
okay. enough of that.
tomorrow:
- Dolphins vs. Cowboys (go miami!)
- season finale of hgtv's design star
- la iglesia
so today has been really nice- especially compared to yesterday. it was a long day at duke. what should have been a quick CT scan turned into almost four hours in the office. most of that time was various nurses doing their best to start an IV in my small veins. six attempts. and they ended up giving up, doing the CT without IV contrast... oh well. :)
i gave myself another dose of my miracle drug, humira, last night. it's actually something i look forward to, especially since i'm able to give it to myself without much timidity. ;) now i have a glimpse of what diabetics deal with EVERY day, not just every other week...
my other miracle drug, prednisone, is definitely proving to be a blessing and a curse. i started out taking 40mg after being in the hospital and have been slowly tapering since then. 40 mg gave me serious insomnia, mood swings(good AND bad ones) increased appetite, and a lovely moon face among other side effects. what's a moon face, you ask? well, think chipmunk cheeks.
needless to say, that last one makes me completely insecure. as in- i'd rather noone see me until it goes away. maybe next month i'll be social again!
okay. enough of that.
tomorrow:
- Dolphins vs. Cowboys (go miami!)
- season finale of hgtv's design star
- la iglesia
Thursday, September 13, 2007
another day, another scan
tomorrow i head to duke for another cat scan. time to check on things, on my progress. then the following tuesday, i'll see my doctor to discuss the results.
also tomorrow is my next humira injection. no big deal. i'm a pro. ha!
fall is something else i'm looking forward to. maybe i've mentioned that here and there. i may be addicted... to this particular season. it seems to always be synonymous with the best shows, the best weather, the best fashion, of the year. one of the things i most look forward to is mute math's tour with eisley.
by the way, everyone be sure to look for mute math's performance on jimmy kimmel live next week. they'll be performing their song typical. in reverse. just like the video.
i'm jazzed.
also tomorrow is my next humira injection. no big deal. i'm a pro. ha!
fall is something else i'm looking forward to. maybe i've mentioned that here and there. i may be addicted... to this particular season. it seems to always be synonymous with the best shows, the best weather, the best fashion, of the year. one of the things i most look forward to is mute math's tour with eisley.
by the way, everyone be sure to look for mute math's performance on jimmy kimmel live next week. they'll be performing their song typical. in reverse. just like the video.
i'm jazzed.
Monday, September 10, 2007
a few wise words from macarthur
"Sin is basically excited or incited and guilt is produced, so that hopefully we come to the conclusion that we are exceedingly sinful.
In a culture like ours, committed to the fact there’s no truth, no authority, no rules and no judge, there is a desperate need to understand there is truth, there is authority, there are rules, there is a judge. And it is time not to equivocate on law, but to preach law. It is a time to hold men accountable to the standard."
the rest of this sermon
In a culture like ours, committed to the fact there’s no truth, no authority, no rules and no judge, there is a desperate need to understand there is truth, there is authority, there are rules, there is a judge. And it is time not to equivocate on law, but to preach law. It is a time to hold men accountable to the standard."
the rest of this sermon
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
republicans and the church
i think i feel the same way about bush and the republican party as i do the church. in this way:
i'm sick and tired of people finding faults here and there (yes there are many valid ones) and responding with bitterness and abandonment.
bush is imperfect, has really disappointed me now and then. the republican party as a whole, in fact. but should i abandon my conservative values because i've been disappointed? surely not. yes, i get that it's kind of cool to lash out against the government, but the whining needs to end. it's more important to stand for what's right than to complain about what isn't. i just want to see some more positivity. come on.
as far as the church is concerned, i see the same problem. why is it so popular right now to bash the church? i have personally been burned in the church. i get it. i am fully aware that the majority of church bodies are dysfunctional messes. and the people in them are basket cases. myself included. a lot of the issues in the church need to be adressed straight up, and godly leadership is crucial and too often non-existent. however, all of these things still do not make it neccessary for us to alienate ourselves, distance ourselves from what some disdainfully refer to as "organized religion."
please. give me a break. the church is the church and we should be praying for reform, holding eachother accountable, reaching out to eachother and the WORLD in love, but not tearing ourselves down from within in the process.
that's all i'm saying.
i'm sick and tired of people finding faults here and there (yes there are many valid ones) and responding with bitterness and abandonment.
bush is imperfect, has really disappointed me now and then. the republican party as a whole, in fact. but should i abandon my conservative values because i've been disappointed? surely not. yes, i get that it's kind of cool to lash out against the government, but the whining needs to end. it's more important to stand for what's right than to complain about what isn't. i just want to see some more positivity. come on.
as far as the church is concerned, i see the same problem. why is it so popular right now to bash the church? i have personally been burned in the church. i get it. i am fully aware that the majority of church bodies are dysfunctional messes. and the people in them are basket cases. myself included. a lot of the issues in the church need to be adressed straight up, and godly leadership is crucial and too often non-existent. however, all of these things still do not make it neccessary for us to alienate ourselves, distance ourselves from what some disdainfully refer to as "organized religion."
please. give me a break. the church is the church and we should be praying for reform, holding eachother accountable, reaching out to eachother and the WORLD in love, but not tearing ourselves down from within in the process.
that's all i'm saying.
Saturday, September 1, 2007
brand new
is it too cliche for me to express how i feel by saying i have a new lease on life? well it's true. feeling this good, not feeling like i'm dragging, too sick to eat or get around is incredible. i forgot what it was like to feel this good- also cliche. but i suppose cliches are cliches for a good reason... it's just nice to want to get out of bed in the morning, to care, to want to run errands and play with jes and eavan. it's awesome. also, i drank coffee this week for the first time in months. with almost no pain. wow.
anyway, last night i gave myself my first two injections of humira. a bit nerve racking at first, but not even a big deal after all. if that's all i have to do to feel this good, praise God!
it's september 1st, and there's a hint of fall in the breeziness. i love it. the anticipation! almost better than the thing itself... not really. :) i love fall.
anyway, last night i gave myself my first two injections of humira. a bit nerve racking at first, but not even a big deal after all. if that's all i have to do to feel this good, praise God!
it's september 1st, and there's a hint of fall in the breeziness. i love it. the anticipation! almost better than the thing itself... not really. :) i love fall.
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